ME Time

Last weeks blog mentioned the importance of me time.  Many of us get so wrapped up in what we have to do for others and career obligations that we neglect ourselves.  Life often gets in the way and before we know it we have placed our mos important possession on the back burner, ourselves.  What do you do to make time for yourself?  How often do you make time for yourself?  How do you honor your me time?

Making time for ourselves is an ultimate act of self love.  I would dare say that there should be some ME time built into each day.  If it is one a five minute walk around the block during lunch break or a hot candlelit bubble bath at the the end of a long day, maybe an hour of your favorite television program or an hour to read that book that you have been waiting to read.  Whatever the case may be ME time should be built into your everyday life.

Maybe asking for a daily dose of me time is a bit much to ask, but what about every other day or several days each week?  When you say you do not have time, think again and replay all of the commitments and obligations you may have and think of what can be delegated to someone else or what can be done at a later time.  Ask your spouse or a loved one to pick the kids up at school.  Instead of scheduling a lunch meeting reschedule the meeting for another day.  Get up an hour earlier than everyone else in your house and focus on yourself.  Make whatever necessary adjustments needed to create me time for yourself.  Put it on the calendar like all of your other appointments, schedule it in your smartphone.  Whatever you need to do schedule your me time today.

The reality is that failure to make time for ourselves makes us of little use to anyone else.  Not unplugging and recharging can lead to burnout, frustration and lack of productivity.  Know when to say no and know when to take a break.  Failure to make time for ourselves can also lead to physical harm to our bodies.  Loss of sleep, loss of appetite, the inability to focus on tasks can all be a result of needing more me time.  What are you going to do to make some time for yourself.

We demonstrate our love for others by what we do for them, caring for our parents and children, taking care of the duties and responsibilities we have on our jobs, but where and when do we demonstrate self love. Manicures and pedicures can help, but if we are hones we often get wrapped up in the conversations and sights and sounds around us at that time.  We may even use that time to check and respond to emails and voice mails and make our to-do lists.  So while we think we are getting in some me time, we are really just going over what needs to be done next.

When was the last time the focus was on YOU.  When was the last time you turned off the cell phone, refused to check your email or voice mail?  When was the last time you treated yourself to dinner and a movie, just you?  When was the last time you went for a walk just to clear your head and focus on nothing? When was the last time you had nothing on your mind and was not worried or thinking about what needed to be done or what had not been done?  

The bottom line is that it is necessary to make time for you.  This ultimately results in making you a better person, employee, wife, mother, friend, girlfriend or whatever label you may carry.  Me time can result in making you more efficient and more effective in what you do.  What are you going to do to make some me time today? What will your me time consist of? 

 

Shows about Single Women (Where are they Now?)

pink tv 2

If you came of age in the 80’s or 90’s like I did you saw television shows that had single women in them.  The 90’s was the height of shows about single, professional women with Living Single, Girlfriends and Sex and the City.  My question is what happened to this type of television programming?

There was nothing like waiting to see the adventures of the urban friends on Living Single.  Many of the characters were people we could relate to or similar to people we knew or aspired to be.  From the independent, sharp witted Maxine to Sinclair with her visionary ideas and off handed ways of doing things, the show made us laugh and made us think at the same time.  The show demonstrated the fun that happens as you are growing as well as the struggles and issues that can arise in daily life.  As I watch re-runs now, I think of how many of the things they experiences in the show I have since experienced in my coming of age.

livingsingle

Girlfriends was another popular show but I never really got into it.  I have tried to watch re-runs (as they are on often), but I just cannot get into the characters like I did Living Single and Sex and the City.  I still however appreciate that the characters in Living Single and Girlfriends had some similarities and offered some laughs as well as some moments of self-reflection.  This is what is missing, in my opinion, from current television programming.

 Hero-Girlfriends-cast

Sex and the City was a more unrealistic view of life, especially for a young, black girl like me.  I do not know the experience of purchasing shoes that are the equivalent of car payment or the joys of going out most nights of the week.  Though the show remains one of my all-time favorites, it was a world of fantasy and excess that I will probably never know.  But the reality is that I still miss these types of television shows.

sex  and the city

Now we are bombarded by reality television and the ins and outs of people’s lives that often seem extreme and ridiculous.  Long gone are the weekly escapades of the fictitious and fun characters we came to grow and love.  Even shows such as Single Ladies on VH1 miss the mark and fail to reach the standards set by shows such as Living Single, Girlfriends and Sex and the City.  Current television programming leaves much to be desired and too much personal information out in the open.  Bring back good programming for women!