Doing for YOU!

be good to yourself

A recent conversation with my female co-workers moved to the topic of what we do to care for ourselves.  One co-worker was preparing to get her first bikini wax for her new husband.  While there is absolutely nothing wrong with that we got into the conversation about grooming and it made me wonder what do we do for ourselves,  not for our partners, our children or others.  What do we do to care for ourselves.

I know that when I was celibate I got my first and only bikini wax.  No one told me to not wear jeans, and no one told me to prepare for hours of throbbing.  While the pain subsided I was very aware of the fact that something happened.  But I did it for me.  There was not the big date, the new spouse or the anticipation of what was to come.  It was simply something I wanted to try and something I wanted to do for myself.

Other than that experience, my self care practices have always been apart of my regular routine.  Whether it be going to the spa several times a year (I try for quarterly) or whether it is the bi-weekly trip to the nail salon for the mani-pedi, I try to take those moments away from everything to enjoy myself and to get some respite from the day to day grind that life brings.  Now those are thing that I do that cost money.

Relax and De-Stress_1

I love baths.  There is nothing like lounging in the hot tub either by candle light or with a good book.  Or maybe it is a bath with a glass of wine or essential oils.  Maybe it is an old school bath with bubbles or epsom salts.  Whatever type of bath it may be there is nothing that can take the edge off like a hot bath. Another thing that can be done at home is an evening cup of tea. I keep a variety of flavored teas in my house.  Some nights after a long day, there is nothing like grabbing my favorite mug and selecting the flavor of tea I wish to indulge in for the evening.  The most important thing I do for my self is prayer and meditation.  This is something that can be done anywhere, anytime, just take the time to get still and to spend that quality, quiet time with yourself and your higher power.

teapot

No matter what you do or how you do it, it is important to be good to yourself.  It is important to make the time and do something for yourself.  It is important to practice self-care because it is important for your mental, emotional and physical well being.  Self care is not a selfish practice, it is more about self love and recharging so you have more to give.  Loving yourself is the best you can do before loving anything else.  So the next time you have a hard day or the next time you are feeling stressed, think about what you can do to give the best care for yourself.

time for you

Fall

fall3

Fall is the time of year where we begin to see the most drastic change in the environment around us.  The leaves are falling from the trees, the days are shorter and the air is cooler.  Fall definitely presents a season of great change for us each and every year.  This has caused me to think about the following questions, what are you falling into or what are you falling out of?

For me I am attempting to fall out of the pattern of living to please others.  It has taken me a long time to realize that in order to be successful with anything or anyone, I must be ok with me.  This is definitely a process since we are often taught that self care is selfish, which is one of the biggest lies in existence.  As professionals, as adults, as spouses/significant others, parents, children, employees or employers we often spend too much time trying to fix or do things for others when our own stuff is raggedy or undone or incomplete.  So this fall I am falling out of people pleasing and into self care.

Quotation-Lucille-Clifton-faith-love-grace-god-Meetville-Quotes-262415

I am also falling in love with the Ministry of No, as well as the ability to honor commitments to myself.  Far too often I have done what was best for others while my needs or wants went to the back burner.  Well this fall begins a new day a new paradigm a new me.  Gone are the times when I do what is right in spite of what I feel.  I am committed to honoring my feeling and my time and my desires.  They have been put on hold too long.

I love fall, not only because my birthday happens to come along in fall, but also because fall is a time to reflect, to let go, to discover, to rediscover, to heal, to let go and to try something new.  Fall is the time when things and maybe people are let go and space is made for what is to come.  I greet fall with arms open wide waiting to see what the universe and most importantly God has in store for me.  This fall will be no different.  I encourage you to examine what fall means to you and allow this to be a season of serenity, of change and freedom.  Welcome to fall!

fall1