ME Time

Last weeks blog mentioned the importance of me time.  Many of us get so wrapped up in what we have to do for others and career obligations that we neglect ourselves.  Life often gets in the way and before we know it we have placed our mos important possession on the back burner, ourselves.  What do you do to make time for yourself?  How often do you make time for yourself?  How do you honor your me time?

Making time for ourselves is an ultimate act of self love.  I would dare say that there should be some ME time built into each day.  If it is one a five minute walk around the block during lunch break or a hot candlelit bubble bath at the the end of a long day, maybe an hour of your favorite television program or an hour to read that book that you have been waiting to read.  Whatever the case may be ME time should be built into your everyday life.

Maybe asking for a daily dose of me time is a bit much to ask, but what about every other day or several days each week?  When you say you do not have time, think again and replay all of the commitments and obligations you may have and think of what can be delegated to someone else or what can be done at a later time.  Ask your spouse or a loved one to pick the kids up at school.  Instead of scheduling a lunch meeting reschedule the meeting for another day.  Get up an hour earlier than everyone else in your house and focus on yourself.  Make whatever necessary adjustments needed to create me time for yourself.  Put it on the calendar like all of your other appointments, schedule it in your smartphone.  Whatever you need to do schedule your me time today.

The reality is that failure to make time for ourselves makes us of little use to anyone else.  Not unplugging and recharging can lead to burnout, frustration and lack of productivity.  Know when to say no and know when to take a break.  Failure to make time for ourselves can also lead to physical harm to our bodies.  Loss of sleep, loss of appetite, the inability to focus on tasks can all be a result of needing more me time.  What are you going to do to make some time for yourself.

We demonstrate our love for others by what we do for them, caring for our parents and children, taking care of the duties and responsibilities we have on our jobs, but where and when do we demonstrate self love. Manicures and pedicures can help, but if we are hones we often get wrapped up in the conversations and sights and sounds around us at that time.  We may even use that time to check and respond to emails and voice mails and make our to-do lists.  So while we think we are getting in some me time, we are really just going over what needs to be done next.

When was the last time the focus was on YOU.  When was the last time you turned off the cell phone, refused to check your email or voice mail?  When was the last time you treated yourself to dinner and a movie, just you?  When was the last time you went for a walk just to clear your head and focus on nothing? When was the last time you had nothing on your mind and was not worried or thinking about what needed to be done or what had not been done?  

The bottom line is that it is necessary to make time for you.  This ultimately results in making you a better person, employee, wife, mother, friend, girlfriend or whatever label you may carry.  Me time can result in making you more efficient and more effective in what you do.  What are you going to do to make some me time today? What will your me time consist of? 

 

No Pressure Here

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Last week I talked about what was right with being single.  This week is about the pressure that people place upon singles to fill what they see as a ‘void’ in our lives.  What is ironic to me is that many of these people are older, some may be divorced, some may still be married and some may have never married at all, but they look at a person who is single and often try to pressure them into marriage.  My message for them is simply this No Pressure Here.

In the past I have bought into the notion that being in a relationship or being married was a necessity, however as I got older and learned to love and enjoy myself and my own company what I found was that partnership is great, but there was nothing wrong with being single.  I heard and preacher and RuPaul say if you don’t love yourself how in the hell can you expect someone else to love you (paraphrased).  Though this statement seems oxymoronic it is true.  There is a freeing feeling of learning to love and enjoy yourself and your own company.

RuPaul Quote

Now I am not advocating for anyone to become a hermit and kick all of their friends to the curb but, spend some quality time with you.  (That will be another blog)

Simply put do not let others pressure you into a situation you do not want to be in.  Do not allow how other people feel you should live your life be the yardstick for how you live your life.  Do not let friends or family repeatedly fix you up or force you into dating situations if that is not where you are in your life at this time. It is up to us to let others know that their opinions and their beliefs and theirs and theirs alone and that we singles can take care of ourselves.

NoPressure

The next time someone attempts to pressure you into a relationship or try to push you into marriage (if you are currently dating and are not ready for marriage) let them know, there is no pressure here.  Be honest and forthcoming about your feelings and about how their pressure is more about them and less about you.  Just look the in the eye and say No Pressure Here!