Suffering in Silence

suffer in silence

As I browsed my Facebook timeline this morning, I saw a number of posts speaking to personal, deeply personal issues many of my Facebook friends have been going through.  Most of it was related to illness.  Other posts were related to attempted suicide and survival, still other posts were related to dating or the attempt to find a suitable mate.  Some people were facing diagnostic tests and surgeries while others were reflecting on how far they have come on their journey.  No matter what the circumstance was I am thankful that they had the courage and conviction to share what they had gone through.  Their testimony can lead to a breakthrough or deliverance for someone else.

As I reflect, there were many things that I have experienced in my life and I am thankful that God has given me the strength and at times the platform to share my life experiences.  I was the product of teenage parents, yet I did not repeat the cycle.  I have had various family members that were addicted to alcohol or drugs, which had significant impacts not just on my life but on the lives of other family members as well.  I was molested as a child and I have endured health challenges and relationship issues.  But through it all, I survived, I looked for lessons to be learned and I became a better person because of what I experienced and in spite of what I experienced.

read my mind

For people of faith we know that if it had not been for the Lord on our side… For those who are not people of faith, I am not sure where your strength and endurance comes from maybe role models or strong support system, but for those who believe, in the absence of role models and support systems we go to the Rock!  It tales strength and courage to make it through those challenges that seem impossible to bear.  It takes even more strength and courage to talk about your experiences and to be a beacon of hope for others. What I have learned is that as you GROW through what you GO through the lesson is lost on you.  It is more so for others so that they can see God in you and know that THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

Stop suffering in silence.  We were not meant to do that.   We were meant to be a blessing to others, but, know that you cannot be a blessing until you have healed and dealt with the issues that you face.  You don’t want to try to help someone when you are still in the throes of your experiences.  Once you have healed, whether it be getting help from a professional, working on your own issues, reaching out to those who love you make sure to NOT suffer in silence.  And know that there is always a rainbow after the rain.



How Do You Vent?


How Do You Vent?

We all find ourselves frustrated at times in our lives.  This frustration may come from work, family, school, or just life in general.  While there are many ways to deal with your frustrations many of us choose to vent.  I found an interesting definition of venting in the Urban Dictionary.  According to the Urban Dictionary venting is described as:

Talking is a coping mechanism that allows a person to rationalize and validate their                 fears, concerns, worries, dreams and hopes. If we are not allowed to vent, we end up               bottling up our emotions which is detrimental to the human psyche and can end up               suffering from it’s side effects. Such as Ulcers, depression, high blood pressure,                       anxiety migraines, fatigue.. the list goes on and on. So when you find yourself in the               position of being the receiver of someone’s griping, moaning, bitching realize that                   not always is advice warranted but more or less you have become the outlet for                       someone’s Physical and Psychological health.

Venting is a form of release, a way for us to deal externally with internal issues.  For many of us venting may be done verbally, we may talk about what is bothering us, we may curse, scream, shout or debate the issue.  These are all verbal forms of venting.

For others venting means crying whether to yourself, to the pillow or to someone you love and trust.  Crying allows us to release the emotions or deal with the pain and move from a place of pain to a place of healing.

Some others turn to shopping (one of my favorites) or what I like to call retail therapy.  This provides the opportunity to get out of what you are feeling and focus on what is in front of you, hopefully a great sale!

Some other people vent by smoking or utilizing substances which I would not recommend, but is a form of outlet for some.

Spa days (whether home spa days or days at an actual spa) provide another source of venting.  You also get rejuvenated and recharged.

Working out is also a great way to vent and a healthier way to vent.  Working out is not only good for your mental health but for your physical health as well.

There is not right or wrong way to vent.  The issue is that you be sure to vent and not hold on to what you are feeling. Being deliberate about expressing your feelings provides you a way take care of your mental and emotional health.  Be sure to vent when you feel frustrated!