No this blog is not about the popular television series Breaking Bad. But just as the show deals with addictions and addictive behaviors, this blog addresses a bad habit I had worked hard at breaking.
My bad habit was shopping for clothes and/or shoes. I would dare say that I was a fashionista, however my habit was bordering addiction. I realized that I could not go to Target or Walmart without browsing the clothing and shoe section looking for something I would wear. This often came at the expenses of my weekly or monthly budget and often meant that there was another drawer or closet that was going to be stuffed to capacity. After realizing that I could go months and yes that is correct months without doing laundry, I realized that I had a problem that needed to be addressed.
My addiction not only affected my living situation, it also affected my budget. Once I begin to see that there was more money in the closet or in the drawer than in the bank, it was obvious that there was something that needed to be done. Those around me saw it and realized that they never saw the same outfit more than twice or that I could have a particular pair of shoes in every color the shoe came in. They saw the outward manifestation of a very private hell.
It took a great deal of time to fix this problem. There were times when I went to Target to buy toilet paper only to go browsing through the clothing section to look at what was on clearance or what was on trend. I had to force myself many times to go to the store with a list and make sure that I stuck to the list. That was one way of beginning to break the habit. I also placed myself on a strict budget, saved money for things such as Spa days or vacations and learned that I could trust myself to walk into a store and not purchase anything.
Breaking habits is not easy. It takes time and dedication and in some cases professional help. I have seen the bonds of addiction affect many people in my family and I know that professional help is needed to address the situation. I also know that prayer and trust in a higher power can also be the best help available at not cost. What is most important is recognizing that there is a bad habit or a problem that needs to be addressed. The next important thing to do is to get the help and/or assistance you may need. Do not let the habit destroy your life. Remember YOU are in ultimate in control of your destiny.