Last week I talked about what was right with being single. This week is about the pressure that people place upon singles to fill what they see as a ‘void’ in our lives. What is ironic to me is that many of these people are older, some may be divorced, some may still be married and some may have never married at all, but they look at a person who is single and often try to pressure them into marriage. My message for them is simply this No Pressure Here.
In the past I have bought into the notion that being in a relationship or being married was a necessity, however as I got older and learned to love and enjoy myself and my own company what I found was that partnership is great, but there was nothing wrong with being single. I heard and preacher and RuPaul say if you don’t love yourself how in the hell can you expect someone else to love you (paraphrased). Though this statement seems oxymoronic it is true. There is a freeing feeling of learning to love and enjoy yourself and your own company.
Now I am not advocating for anyone to become a hermit and kick all of their friends to the curb but, spend some quality time with you. (That will be another blog)
Simply put do not let others pressure you into a situation you do not want to be in. Do not allow how other people feel you should live your life be the yardstick for how you live your life. Do not let friends or family repeatedly fix you up or force you into dating situations if that is not where you are in your life at this time. It is up to us to let others know that their opinions and their beliefs and theirs and theirs alone and that we singles can take care of ourselves.
The next time someone attempts to pressure you into a relationship or try to push you into marriage (if you are currently dating and are not ready for marriage) let them know, there is no pressure here. Be honest and forthcoming about your feelings and about how their pressure is more about them and less about you. Just look the in the eye and say No Pressure Here!